GOUT GOUT, THE SPRINT SENSATION COMING FOR THE THRONE. GOUT OF THIS WORLD.

14 May

FASTEST U20 TO WALK ON PLANET EARTH.

Usain Bolt has sat comfy in the sprinting throne for decades but there’s one man waiting for his moment to dethrone the King. Call the bookies, pulling up from the land down under and crossing the barrier reef to LA for Olympics 2028, Gout Gout is what you call inevitable. Saying G’day to the camera flashes of Rodeo Drive as he pulls up dripped out in three stripes to make Beverley Hills his own type of rodeo, critics and hatewatchers all over but this man telling them to stay quiet and watch him burst into flames. Streets say the Opera House is where the shows are at, but Gout Gout stepped up to the Sydney track to put on a performance of his own and break the u20 200m World Record with a time of 19.67s to make him the fastest Australian ever at the age of 18. Let me break that down for you one more time, this man at 18 is faster than Usain Bolt was at 20 and any Australian ever. The word ‘generational’ is thrown around a lot these days but not calling Gout Gout generational may be nothing short of disrespectful. Wait till he lines up on the starting blocks in LA, this is what we call Aussie Rules.

THE FUTURE OF SPRINTING.

2032 houses the Brisbane Olympics, calling Gout Gout for his homecoming event, this marvel going to make the race startline his infinity war and takeover like he’s Thanos as he finishes quicker than a snap of the fingers. Gout of this world, it’s time to watch Gout Gout, bolt Bolt. The sprinter broke the Australian 200m record when he was only 16. Call Saka the original starboy, but that name may have a new bearer - we haven’t seen potential with this high a ceiling since Messi broke out of La Masia. This is what you call controlled ego, only ever having one coach since he’s started and staying in school to graduate with straight A’s, moving like Isagi as he conquers his own blue lock. Greatness personified. Potential unmatched. Gout of this universe.